Saturday, May 29, 2010

My short reflection

Here's a question for you: Can you honestly go shopping without buying anything. Anything at all. Not even lip balm. Can you?

The restraint is impossible to maintain! What is it about shops and malls that make you want to buy something every single time you head out to one?

I say this because whenever I'm broke, I stay far away from any retail outlets. A trip out to a mall or shop must end with a bag of something, or I can't leave.

I need to learn the art of restraint in this area. It's a long and possibly impossible road to take.

But you know how it is, if you can't fight it, embrace it!

Love. SB.

Monday, May 24, 2010

Shopping hazards..3..2..1.

Hello my darlings,

I wanna address the issue of people being shopping hazards.

Nothing can be more unpleasant than coming across inconsiderate shoppers who make you want to do very unpleasant things to them. Here's my Shopping Hazard Top 3 Countdown....

Shopping hazard 3: The women with the big shopping bags

Yea sure I get it, you're splurging, having a great time, but being hit by your bags because you expect everyone to move out of your way - makes me want to do very unpleasant things to you. I've been scratched numerous times by the sharp edges of those fancy paper bags. To these women: It really ISN'T all about you.

Shopping hazard 2: The women with the redundant boyfriend/husband

Why do women bring their boyfriends or husbands to a sale?! Where's the logic in that? Ok, maaaaybe he handles the expenses and you need him to foot the bill - then get him to join you at the cashier. Don't drag your husband or boyfriend around the sale like he's your pet. We don't even have enough space to move about in a sale, last thing we need is someone redundant hanging around.

Shopping hazard 1: Attention seeking, noisy biatches

Really darlings, no one wants to know how you feel about a certain piece of clothing, bag or pair of shoes. NO ONE. So when you and your girlfriends start bitching or raving about something, keep it to yourselves. This means the following - no screaming, no screeching, no jumping or hopping about on the spot.

Silence is gold, shopping in peace and enjoying the ambient music is part of the shopping experience. Already, having to deal with the shoving and snatching isn't pleasant, the last thing any sane shopper wants is a screeching airhead or bunch of them.

I think I really need to reiterate this (since it's at the top of my list) - NOBODY CARES WHAT YOU THINK.

Disclaimer: These opinions are personal, general and for the sake of entertainment. They are not meant to offend anybody, just meant to highlight issues that need to be addressed.

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Return of the Maxi Dress

Really darlings, is it time to see it again? Our friend the Maxi Dress?

Just a little over a year ago, it was "hot". Then came the short hiatus and now it'ssssss baaaaccckkk...

The problem is, like I said before, that if a trend has a short hiatus and finds it way back again, it just looks passe. It doesn't look new or refreshing. It just gives me the feeling of "oh, it's back." as opposed to "cool! It's actually back"

However, the good news is, designers have been refreshing the maxi dress and giving it a new look with new types of fabric and cuts. I'm talkin' chiffon and linen (not together on the same dress), although there are the typical cotton and rayon types. The upper part of the dress is no longer the usual spaghetti straps or tube tops - they're now available with fluttery straps, short butterfly sleeves and some with princess sleeves.

More printed materials are used and plain maxi dresses are almost non-existent. The prints are not quite the typical bohemian nor are they leaning towards the curtain type flower prints. The prints seem whimsical.

Even the tube top maxi dresses aren't just with plain smocking. They come with strings to fasten at the chest or an extension of the material to tie a bow with at the back.

So really, after all my bitching about this passe piece of clothing, passe as it may be, it has been reinvented. Just like a brownie with whipped creamed but instead of being topped with a cherry, it's topped with a blueberry.

Ciao my darlings. SB out.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Disappointing shopping trip

Hello my darlings,

I am utterly disappointed at the clothing shops at Far East Plaza. It used to be the place to go to for the coolest stuff. Casual, cheap clothing that's funky and fashionable.

But what did I see tonight when I was there? The same old stuff in every single shop. It's the kinda stuff you can find being sold on the local blog shops. It bores the hell out of me: Tailored dresses, frilly tops, see through tops, over embellished tops and dresses...What the hell is going on?!

I went there with every intention to buy cool casual wear. I'm talkin, cotton tanks, ribbed or non-ribbed, with awesome prints on them. Or casual tees. But what did I find? Stuff made for women who wanna look like dolls. Come on! Even the shorts had frills and little embellishments sewed onto them.

The only cotton tanks and tees were basics/plain and the usual little miss collection and vintage prints...like those don't get old (I say that with sarcasm. It's so over. Why don't they get it? It's so, oooverrr)

So that was one disappointing shopping trip to Far East Plaza. The whole damn place screams korean fashion, come shop for dolly clothes. Ugh!

Can't say that Mango's latest collection was any different. Frills, lace, tailored dresses, flower prints, ribbons, bows! MORE LACE!!

Looks like the lace, frills, bows and hideous flower prints are here to stay...for another season at least.

I've definitely seen enough of those....will someone please pass me a plastic bag? I feel sick.

Ciao my dears. - love, SB

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

The $9,400 Kinokuniya guys

Hello my darlings,

I was at Kinokuniya today at Ngee Ann City. I picked up a mothers' day gift and a birthday present for my sis.

I was at the cashier, paying for the books when I heard a woman saying..."Nine Thousand, Three hundred and Forty-Six". I turned to look, and there were two African men whipping out thousand dollar bills, hundred dollar bills and fifty dollar bills. I looked at the amount shown on the cash register...it really was $9,346. I couldn't believe my eyes, nearly 10 grand on books?! And they were paying it all in CASH?! Cold hard cash!

There was a whole pile of a wide variety of books sitting on the counter. I didn't observe what kinda books they were, I was way too distracted watching all that cash coming out of the man's wallet.

Now that's one crazy situation I'll never come across again in my life.

Till next time darlings, happy shopping.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Training for the Great Singapore Sale

One thing men would NEVER understand: Why women get so violent during sales.

The Great Singapore Sale is THE sale of the year. And I was at a mall the other day when I saw women training...in the mall...for the Great Singapore Sale. Well apparently, here're a few things you need to know to have a successful shopping experience...meaning...getting the great bargains and making sure you get what you want - not letting that gorgeous bag leave with some other woman! The only woman leaving with THAT bag...IS YOU!

You'll thank me for this...courtesy of Amore fitness...:

Step 1: Get ready to charge for that bag, sitting there on the shelf..only one piece..












Step 2: Some biatch got to the bag first! It's punch time...aim anywhere. Just make sure it'll hurt enough for her to drop THAT bag!












She's still clutching onto it.


Step 3: Knee her ... anywhere!












Step 4: Brace yourself for a counter attack...biatch, bag, hitting the crap out of you..DEFEND!














Sale's in June, you've got a month to train..all the best. Remember, it's not the strength..it's the technique! ;)

*This article was meant for the purpose of entertainment only and for no other purpose. Actual activity in the pictures was a Tae Bo demonstration by Amore fitness at City Square Mall.

Orchard Central vs Ugly Skirt

Hello my darlings,

Long hiatus...

I was planning to talk about Orchard Central (OC), about my experience there, checking it out, seeing for myself ... why all the bad publicity... here's what I have to say about OC: scary, trapped, anxiety, panic, acrophobia, sweaty palms, sad, buzz kill, glass labyrinth, claustrophobic and boring.

I was all up for talking about OC until I saw this SKIRT!! Totally overrides OC.

Hokay, when you go shopping and see a skirt like this...you know it's horrific enough to be stuck in your mind for a couple of days. So many questions come to mind, lookin at this skirt.

But the biggest question of all is WHY!:

1. Why was it designed
2. Why is it sold
3. Why was it approved for production
4. Why would the designer think it was fit for human use

WHY!

I wouldn't even wear it in the dark. I'd rather be naked.

TSB (The Shopping Biatch) out!